Do you feel like you’re losing your identity or your peace of mind in a relationship? You may not realize this but you may be in a toxic relationship. By Natalia Avdeeva
Toxic relationships are all around us.
Have you ever been in a relationship where you feel more stressed and tired rather than happy and glowing?
You may unknowingly be trapped in a relationship that’s leaving you drained and angry.
Toxic relationships come in many hues.
Sometimes, we date toxic people.
And at other times, we have friends and even family who are toxic for our lives.
[Read: 10 types of toxic friends you need to avoid]
What is a toxic relationship?
A toxic relationship is a relationship that’s detrimental to your life and existence.
When you enter a toxic relationship with a person who’s not an ideal match for you, you may actually end up losing yourself and becoming a person you wouldn’t be too happy to be.
Some people that we date fill our lives with happiness.
And toxic people just drain the happiness out of our lives.
Lovers with toxic personalities may not necessarily be bad people.
But when they impose their negative way of life on you, it could affect the way you look at life and destroy you from the inside.
The bad part about toxic relationships is that you can’t really recognize it at first.
But as time goes by, something about them starts to change and everything they do may start to frustrate you. [Read: Signs you’re falling out of love with your partner]
Of course, you won’t be able to blame them because they’d still appear to be the same person you fell in love with.
So what’s changed then?
The 15 types of toxic relationships
Toxic relationships are created in two circumstances, when you enter a relationship with someone who’s completely incompatible with your way of life, or when you enter a relationship with someone who’s just a really bad person.
There are many kinds of toxic lovers, but they all find their way into one of these types of toxic relationships.
So if you ever feel like you’re trapped in a bad relationship with one of these types of lovers, look for the exit door, because no matter how much you think you can change the relationship for the better, you just can’t. Well, unless your lover makes a conscious effort to become a more accommodating person. [Read: How to let go of a relationship that’s bad for you]
#1 Controlling relationships. Does your partner want to have a say in everything you do? Or do they like to know everything you’re doing, even if it means interrupting you aggressively to find out what you’re doing right that instant?
If you’re in a relationship where your partner behaves like the approver where everything you do has to pass through their scrutiny, you’re definitely in the middle of a toxic romance. [Read: 15 subtle signs that reveal a controlling partner]
#2 Jealous partners. Is your partner overly jealous when it comes to you spending time with your friends? Or do they constantly feel like you’re sharing a certain s*xual chemistry with someone even if you have a happy laugh while chatting over the phone? A bit of jealousy can be cute. But when it affects your life, it’s definitely not good for you. [Read: How to make your jealous partner not-so-jealous]
#3 Bitchy lovers. Does your lover sit down with you and constantly nag about their bad days or whine about their problems until you feel like crawling under the couch or running away from them? Partners who find happiness only while complaining about their life can turn you into a negative person too.
#4 A negative thinking partner. A negative thinking partner is one of the worst of the lot. Does your partner think life is extremely unfair to them? Or do they only see the negative side to everything in their life? These kinds of partners will suck the happiness out of your life even before you realize it. [Read: Is negative thinking ruining your life?]
#5 Puts you down all the time. This is the “I told you so” kind of partner. Instead of helping you out, they always look for a way to make you feel like a dumb, spoilt child. Perhaps, they have issues in life or they just love feeling powerful by putting you down all the time.
#6 Cheating partner. Have you caught your partner cheating on you once? And then again? Some partners just can’t stay committed to one relationship, and there’s nothing you can do about it. If a partner doesn’t respect you or think you’re important enough, they’re bound to cheat on you constantly. [Read: 25 reasons behind why women cheat so easily]
#7 Lying lover. Some lovers just can’t help but lie all the time. You may know they’re lying, but you can’t prove it, can you? When you’re in a toxic relationship like this, you’d end up feeling more insecure and frustrated, and may even feel paranoid about the whole relationship, while your partner laughs and lies away all the time.
#8 Abusive partner. An abusive partner doesn’t always have to abuse you physically. At times, even vocal abuses can have the same impact. If you partner raises a hand at you or threatens you with abuses for any reason, don’t put up with it. The more you stay in a toxic relationship like that, the more you’d make your partner feel dominant over you.
#9 The blaming lover. Are you in a relationship with someone who constantly takes their frustrations out on you or blames you for their mistakes? You may think they’re acting childish, but your partner may genuinely think it’s your fault and may even get increasingly frustrated with you. The next time you get blamed for something you haven’t done, stand your ground. Or you’ll end up in a messy relationship where both of you hate each other. [Read: Top 20 reasons for divorce that most couples overlook]
#10 An extremely insecure partner. When you’re in a relationship with someone and are forced to spend most of your day away from them, a little bit of insecurity is inevitable, especially if you’re meeting good looking members of the opposite s*x all the time.
But if your partner is extremely insecure and constantly needs tons of reassurance and proof of love from you, perhaps it’s time to have that talk. Or you’ll end up getting frustrated with your partner all the time.
#11 A demanding partner. Demanding partners expect the best from you, but yet they never return the favor. They constantly try to boss around you or tell you how lucky their friends are for having such understanding partners. Being in a relationship like this will make you feel helpless and depressed, because no matter what you do, you’ll never be good enough.
#12 Over the top perfectionists. Perfectionists are great people to be in a relationship with. But if you’re dating someone who’s obsessive about the way they want things in their life, it’ll always leave you frustrated. And obsessive people with a perfectionist streak in them will always find faults with you. Can you really live with someone like that?
#13 Narcissistic partners. Narcissistic partners are extremely materialistic and shallow. Your partner may love you, but they still treat you like an accessory. They feel embarrassed when you haven’t dressed your best when you step out together, and the whole world revolves around them, no matter what you do or say. Unless you like being treated like a doll, this relationship will definitely not help with your self esteem. [Read: 15 signs of a high maintenance woman]
#14 The competitive lover. Everything is a competition for these types of lovers. They may say they love you and they may even care about you. But they will never allow you to beat them at anything, be it a game or when it comes to earning more money. They’re sore losers and always want to be pampered. And most of all, they love seeing you fall in life so they can magnanimously help you back on your feet. [Read: 7 secret signs of a bad relationship]
#15 The manipulative partner. Does your partner constantly play with words or try to trick you into believing something by manipulating you? If you’re dating someone who tries to lie or manipulate you into getting things done their way all the time, perhaps it’s time you let them know you’re not that dumb to fall for such childish tricks. [Read: 9 relationship stages that all couples go through]
It’s not easy to recognize toxic relationships because there’s a bit of that toxic side in all our love lives. But if it ever crosses the thin line, either talk about it or get out of it!