Can humor affect relationships? At times, they really can. Read these 12 everyday types of humor that can make or break a relationship over time. By Colin Andrews
A sense of humor is a great trait to have.
But at times, it can do more damage than good, especially if you don’t know where to draw the line.
You may think you’re a funny person who is the life of a party, but are you pushing your lover away or annoying them without realizing it?
[Read: 7 secret signs of a relationship that’s going bad]
The types of humor
There are so many types of humor all around us, from sadistic to stand up to satire. And they’re all great.
Humor draws people and it can also make your personality feel more attractive.
Think Anthony Bourdain or Simon Cowell, they’re humorous albeit in their own ways.
And humor can be a great asset to keep a relationship exciting too.
Together time can be fun and happy, and even when other couples say they have nothing interesting to talk to each other after a few months into the relationship, you and your partner may still have a fun time in each other’s company after being together for years.
The 12 good and bad types of humor in love
There are many types of humor, but when it comes to relationships, they can be summarized into 12 big types.
If you want to have a happy relationship where both of you have a happy laugh all the time, then focus on the 7 good types of humor. And if you want to avoid any resentment or anger in love, learn to stay away from the 5 bad types of humor.
You may not realize this, but more often than not, you may find yourself using the bad types of humor more often than any other kind. [Read: Things to talk about in a perfect relationship]
The good types of humor
Good natured humor brings the couple closer together. There’s no fear of being judged, and there’s no need to be on guard when you’re around each other.
And most importantly, this kind of humor can make the relationship more exciting and give you many more conversations to talk about.
Here are 7 types of good humor that’ll help you be the perfect happy couple. [Read: 12 tips to be a happy couple that’s envied by other couples]
#1 Self deprecating humor. Self deprecating humor is the type of humor where you put yourself down or accept a mistake gracefully with humor. It lightens the mood, and lets your partner know you’re not upset or annoyed at the same time.
Almost always, you tend to get angry with the person you’re around when you make a mistake because you don’t want to accept your own fault. But by using this kind of humor, you can acknowledge your fault and make the whole episode feel funny at the same time. [Read: How to use self deprecating humor to impress a girl]
#2 Bitchy humor. Have you ever whined about how annoying a TV show is, or how annoying a friend of yours is? Well, these bitchy jokes are nasty and mean, but as long as your partner feels the same way about the situation or person, they’ll join in the joke and both of you would end up having a fun conversation bitching about someone else. And gossiping about something both of you find interesting will always bring both of you closer.
#3 Practical humor. When was the last time you played a prank on your partner? This one’s a laugh that’ll always be funny each time you talk about it. But it all depends on your lover’s moods. If your partner’s fun and forgives you quite easily, practical humor may be the best remedy to keep love exciting and young forever.
#4 Childish humor. Childish humor is silly and even borderline stupid. But as long as both of you enjoy it, knock yourselves out. Call each other silly cute names, smack your lover on the butt and run away to the next room, sprinkle a few drops of water when your lover’s asleep… you know the works, don’t you? It’s silly and annoyingly funny, just as long as it doesn’t get wicked. [Read: How to find the perfect cute pet name for your partner]
#5 Situational humor. Situational humor is the kind of humor where you use the situation to create a funny circumstance out of it. It can help ease out awkward situations in public, and make your partner feel grateful to you too. The more both of you use situational humor to support each other, the closer both of you will get over time.
#6 Bathroom humor. Have you ever shared dirty jokes about wood or something feeling too wet? Double entendre, or double meaning jokes, is a perfect example of bathroom humor. If your partner’s saying something to you, and you respond with something s*xual in a funny way, it may end with a slap on your arm, but it’ll make conversations a lot more fun.
#7 Take it easy humor. When your partner’s feeling down, share your own awkward, funny story about how you screwed up in a similar situation. The take it easy type of humor is best used when you want to make awkward situations a little less awkward. Use the circumstance to relate with your partner and say something to them that’ll make them feel better about themselves, and your partner will love you for always having a way to cheer them up.
The bad types of humor
While the good types of humor can bring couples closer, the bad types will distance you and your lover, leaving both of you feeling guarded and insecure and most of all, annoyed.
And these types of humor, you definitely need to avoid in a relationship.
#1 Sarcasm. Sarcasm comes really easily when you’re annoyed with your partner. For most of us, sarcasm is a shield we use to defend ourselves or try to hurt someone while trying to appear calm. But sarcasm, as funny as it may seem, is not a good kind of humor to use, especially in love. It’ll only end up leaving your partner bitter and angry because they can’t even argue back with you. [Read: How to fight fair in a relationship and end an argument pleasantly]
#2 Insulting humor. Have you ever used a joke to poke fun of your partner or anger them, perhaps by speaking badly about their family or about some particular incident? Never use veiled humor to insult the one you love. It’s true, you’re only joking, but you’re still leaving a deep impact.
#3 Cocky humor. Are you too full of yourself? Well, then you’re probably familiar with the cocky type of humor. Do you answer your partner’s questions with a line that compliments yourself all the time?
Your lover says, “How do I look?” You say, “You’re with me, of course you look good!”
If your partner knows you well, cocky humor may be worth a snort and a snigger. But if you use cocky humor in excess, you’d only make your partner roll their eye balls in annoyance. And over time, they may even start hating the traits about you that you constantly brag about. [Read: 10 biggest problems in a relationship and how to fix it]
#4 Flawed humor. If you don’t like something about your partner’s behavior, tell them about it. Don’t use humor to reveal a flaw. When you try to reveal your partner’s flaws by using humor, it usually hits them harder because it seems like criticism and yet they can’t argue back with you because you’re only joking.
#5 Picky humor. Have you ever teamed up with your friends to pick on your partner just for the fun of it? When you gang up and tease your partner, it may feel like fun to you, but it makes your partner feel weak, lonely and miserable. It’s high school bullying all over again. [Read: The 10 types of love all of us experience in our lives]
If your partner buys a new shirt you don’t like, and another friend of your partner says the same thing, don’t constantly pull your partner’s leg in front of friends reminding everyone about how awful that shirt was. That’s definitely you picking on something and turning a joke into a miserable feeling